Thanksgiving Forecast

My pastor read this at church on Sunday and I thought it was great!

Thanksgiving Forecast
Turkeys will thaw in the morning, then warm in the oven to an afternoon high near 190 F. The kitchen will turn hot and humid, and if you bother the cook, be ready for a severe squall or cold shoulder. During the late afternoon, the cold front of a knife will slice through the turkey, causing an accumulation of three or four inches on plates. Mashed potatoes will drift across one side while the cranberry sauce creates slippery spots on the other. Please pass the gravy. A weight watch and indigestion warning have been issued for the entire area, with increased stuffiness around the beltway. During the evening, the turkey will diminish and taper off to leftoevers, dropping to a low of 34 F in the refrigerator. Looking ahead to Friday and Saturday, high pressure to eat sandwiches will be established. Flurries of leftovers can be expected both days with a 50% chance of scattered soup late in the day. We expect a warming trend where the soup develops. By early next week, eating pressure will be low as the only wish left will be the bone.

Adios!
~D